Suicide and Chronic Pain

Suicide and Chronic Pain

Of all the consequences that accompany chronic pain, none other is as heartbreaking as suicide. While the physical impacts of pain are recognized and can often be improved, the stress associated with chronic pain, social stigma, and feelings of hopelessness can be overwhelming, sometimes leading a person to feel that life is no longer worth living.

Ann Nuttall and Michael Peterson married as teenagers and expected to live healthy and happy lives together. But two years into a loving partnership, they faced what would become a lifelong obstacle: pain.

Michael was prone to intestinal blockages and had undergone surgeries as a child to fix them, but the resulting scar tissue caused him to have frequent bouts of severe abdominal pains from partial obstructions. His pain was worsened when a co-worker ran and tripped into Michael, dislodging a bone fragment from his spine that began impinging on a nerve. This simple accident resulted in four back surgeries and years of pain for Michael as well as much hardship for his wife.

As a devout believer in Mormon teachings, Ann felt it was her duty to care for Michael. When life got especially tough, she occasionally contemplated divorce, but her faith would not let her consider it for long. She cared for Michael as best she could by managing his medicine and by assisting him with tasks he could not do on his own. Her most comforting task was simply listening to him.

Despite all of Ann’s work and the many medical efforts to provide Michael with relief, the pain gradually took over his personality and outlook on life. His normal fun-loving energy was replaced with constant commentary on death, sometimes including hints of violence toward others as well as himself. Eventually, Ann moved away from him for the sake of her own safety and that of her children.

Unfortunately, like so many others who struggle with chronic pain in their everyday lives, Michael’s story did not end well. Depression, mental fatigue, and pain drove him to take his own life.

Michael had social support that many people in severe chronic pain never experience. Ann was a faithful caregiver to him for decades. Yet in the end even her love was not enough to keep him in this life.

Though rarely discussed, suicide with people in chronic pain occurs often. Estimates of the number of people with chronic pain who think seriously about taking their lives range from 20 to 50 percent. It is believed that out of the approximately 36,000 people who complete suicides every year in the United States, at least 10 to 15 percent are people suffering from chronic pain.

Michael, Ann, and all those living with pain and depression are the reason why increased funding for alternative care for relieving chronic pain is essential. The burden of chronic pain too often exceeds the human will to live. This is the ultimate tragedy of chronic pain for both the person in pain and the caregiver.

My book, “The Painful Truth,” was released in September 2015.


  1. Angie on September 22, 2015 at 9:39 pm

    Pain is a parasite that latches onto your body. It drains your body till its a shell. You think what did I ever do to deserve this. Is it a demon that feeds on your body and enjoying every ache?

    • Jeanne Sumstine on December 25, 2016 at 1:59 am

      How true, all we want is a day off. Just imagine looking forward to that one day of freedom. plan something special for that day. We deserve it. We also deserve respect, understanding and compassion. It (chronic pain )can happen to anyone at any time. So very tired of waking up to this every day as I know all others dealing with the same.

      • Sherry on January 22, 2017 at 10:43 am

        I feel every word you said. Compassion, not Contempt. Respect, a rest or a single day to plan a social event. I suffer with RSD, when I go to bed at night, i think the very best thing that could happen to me tomorrow- would be to not wake up.

        • Dianna on July 27, 2017 at 6:07 am

          I have very severe issues with my back which caused me to give up a career that I loved. I was in so much pain that I actually attempted suicide. Thankfully I am here still but now I can no longer get any pain medication for the major issues I have thus creating the same circumstances that made me think of stopping the pain myself permantely. It’s no big secret why people with chronic pain commit suicide, it’s so incredibly horrible to live this way

          • Carlos on August 6, 2017 at 10:10 pm

            Carlos says

            I have degenerative disc disease in y back and neck and narrowing of my spine and cervical area. I develop a resistance to opiates and am at my wits end. I cannot do anything except very light things but do not go out. I have never abused the opiates but it is almost impossible to get them because of the governments lie about some supposed epidemic. My wonderful wife of 42 wonderful years is very supportive but she is suffering. I will hang on to get the finances set for her and then I want to die. I know that this sounds crazy but I worked 35 years which the last 8 were hell for my family and I Love them more than I can say. I will end this soon so they can live the lives they deserve. Thank you for listening, God Bless you and I hope you will be healed where I have not.

  2. Jim Broatch on September 23, 2015 at 8:36 pm

    RSDSA conducted an Internet survey of people with Complex Regional Pain Syndrome (CRPS) with Johns Hopkins School of Medicine. 49% of the participants considered committed suicide and 15% acted on the impulse.

    • jason on December 16, 2017 at 8:50 pm

      crps has taken me my family my life work comp i had it or they have me they my uas that were taken by wc now have shown that i didnt take a med that i pay for they usta didnt show up an the last 2 had things i didnt take pain mang is no more so its either street help or self help 7years lost they win what can i do im tired…

  3. Maz on September 25, 2015 at 5:58 pm

    Having lived with chronic pain for a long time myself, I can honestly say I have bouts of depression associated with the pain. I’m going through a depressive phase again thanks to living with this wretched fms/m.e…..its horrible. People who are choosing to ignore that it exists compound our depression. Thank you for your support.

  4. Skychaser on August 13, 2016 at 12:09 pm

    I too have been living with chronic pain and have considered ending it. Sone times it seems like there is no other way of coping.

    • DAN on December 5, 2017 at 1:24 pm

      I live with chronic pain and going for my third surgery. They are put a painpump in. I too think about killing myself. The just gets overwhelmed.

  5. opal on October 30, 2016 at 11:27 pm

    Opalescentfirefly October 30th 2016 i worked for 12 years until i could not do it anymore. i tried going to school to finish a degree enabling me to go back to work. i am in a wheelchair and the physicians i go to tell me this is my choice and all my choice. they are so wrong and i have to endure their stupidity along with their insults. i have lost many of my abilities along with any positive aspects of my life. i am perceived as being histrionic. i am more than ready to leave this world. i have been in chronic pain for over 20 years.

    • Ashley Bealer on November 5, 2016 at 11:53 pm

      Don’t Opal. Take that strong emotion and use that stand up to those same drs and demand you be treated humanely! I know it sounds silly but I had drs brushing my pain off but I finally snapped on them(looking back I was finally being my own advocate!). And one even admitted that he was waiting for me to finally put my foot down. Drs often can’t 100% read or understand our pain. But some have told me (I am very open about this issue and talk to all i can both to raise the awareness and so I can learn more.) I’m told that if they have a patient go from polite to becoming a firm, sure of themself, determined patient that is truly seeking help, them Dr often finally feels that this person is legit and they WANT to treat the pain. Nobody becomes a Dr to intentionally leave any patient in undue pain. Sadly laws, policies,you know….has their hands tied or erring on the safe side. But evidently they can tell the difference between a pain patient finally losing it and start demanding they be cared for completely which includes pain. And that when “seekers” get “mad” it’s very obvious they are just wanting meds. The arguments they make are far different than the arguments a true pain patient would have. I wish I could promise that will work but i can’t. But i can promise that you are in a very temporary emotional place and suicide is a very final and no win answer to it. But friends, and you can even call local hospitals and ask to speak with a patient advocate. They will help you and sometimes even go with you and help you learn how to be assertive and also stand firm
      In your treatment needs, without going overboard. I will be praying for you and hope you check into and/or try what I’ve mentioned before you make any final descions. If you only take one thing from my comment let it be this….”I CARE ABOUT YOU!” And
      I mean that, that’s why I commented to begin with. Because I too live in pain, I’ve been where you are, I’ve also lost an eriely high number of friends and a cousin to suicide and I’m only 31. I’ve seen what suicide leaves in its wake. I’ve also met many that have had failed attempts and 9 out of 10 of them are glad they did not succeed. Proving further that it’s only a temporary place and you CAN push thru it and talk to those around you. They care and they will help you carry the burdens and help you find ways to get you the treatment, care, and respect you deserve.

    • Louisa on February 25, 2017 at 10:58 pm

      Dear Opal-
      If you are still here, I get you. 28 yrs ago a chiropractor dislocated my mandible backwards causing all muscles in face/jaw/head to go into and stay contracted.
      No one has ever seen this, sick to death of shite docs, you get subjected to their stupid beliefs, even blamed for your pain, and yet they are just fine with sending you home and not give you another thought. They won’t even ask other doctors for input. If I had been in a large city when this happened I’d have been in the ER that day with facial trauma, am just waiting for my elderly kitty to finish out her life, then I am going with her.
      There is nothing like thinking I will be out of this 24/7 head/face/neck crushing hell. We are prisoners of our own bodies and victims of bad health care in this country. What I would give to live in Canada or Europe, there are rarely suicides from pain because they get their pain and cause addressed.

    • Kelly on October 25, 2017 at 2:39 pm

      The medical profession does not get it. I do live in Canada and yes, we don’t have the financial challenges but our doctors are far from understanding chronic pain or having real options to deal with it. How in the heck can we go to the moon, replace organs but still have so little understanding of the mechanisms of pain and the ability to turn it off when it is not useful. I am fortunate to have a good doctor but she is still so limited in what she can offer. I am a burden and I hate that.

  6. Jean Marie Casaldi on December 20, 2016 at 6:23 am

    I have been in agony since an incompetent surgeon operated on my back. The end result: I went 19 days without moving my bowels. I suddenly realized that I could FEEL that I have to defecate. I have had to hand expel my feces because the nerves to my descending colon do not work. I am on the exact pain meds I was on before the surgery- but now the neurosurgeon claims that my meds are the cause of my constipation. I also cannot feel when I have to urinate until my bladder is so full that the pressure down there tells me I am seconds away from peeing all over myself. When I do go, have to “push’ my urine out like when I delivered a baby.

    The pain has prevented me from sleeping in a bed. The insurance company will pay for a $100,000 surgery but will boy buy me a bed, which would cost maybe @2,000. So now I sleep in an armchair or on our futon. Being newly married, I have to now sleep in another room from my husband. I wake up screaming in pain, and he has to come and comfort me… I often am not fully awake… It’s similar to “night terrors” very children can have.

    Now my doctor has begun to cut down my meds…. This nightmare life is only going to get worse. I feel I am destroying my husbvand’s life. He really cannot work because my ENTIRE family- mother, sisters, children – have abandoned me. I have contact with one daughter, but she lives nearly 2,000 miles from me, and is planning to move even further away soon.

    Hopelessness is my constant companion. I really do not know what i am supposed to do. When my doctor finally completely refuses to write my pain meds, well then, I will be in so much agony that I can see only one solution. You can guess what that will be. And my whole life will end up being just a statistic.

  7. Jean Marie Casaldi on December 20, 2016 at 6:29 am

    How can I edit my post? I have difficulty seeing due to diabetes, and the draft has mistakes. The draft print is light gray, and very hatd for me to see.

    • Stacey Miller on December 20, 2016 at 9:49 am

      Jean, if you hover over your comment (below your name and the date), you’ll see an edit button. Unfortunately, you won’t be able to change the color to make it more readable.

    • Karen J Kidwell on January 12, 2017 at 5:44 pm

      We can all understand typos, That is the least of Your worries. See if Your Dr. Will send You to pain management. I know what it is like living in chronic pain, And How I cringe every morning I wake, that it will be yet another Day full of Pain, even though I am in Pain management, It takes them awhile to get Your dosage right. Don’t give up, try this first. Or find another Dr, That will refer You tp Pain management. I personally Hate Pain meds, But. It is either accept this is how life is, or end it all . Please don’t give up . Someone has to send You to pain management. Search, do whatever it takes. I am sorry For what You are going through, I understand all to well . God Bless You. I will pray for You.

      • meowmeow808 on January 26, 2017 at 10:16 pm

        I swear that once I started pain management my life just went downhill. Been in pain management for many, many years. It’s drug after drug, finding the right one that works for you. Even had a pain pump implanted and eventually taken out. Drugs not only change a person in so many ways, but I have yet to find one to take away the majority of the pain. After decades of pain finally referred to a neurosurgeon. Just had discectomy and laminectomy last month. Was given the impression I’d be much better within a short time. Not so. At this very moment can barely walk. Pain in my right sacroiliac going down my leg… can barely walk. Have taken so much time off work that I worry about being let go. Can’t afford that! No support from ‘husband’ who I’m supposed to be divorcing for a couple of years now (can’t work on that because of the pain). Idiot even asked me the day after surgery why I was in so much pain if I just had surgery to fix it! The world is full of idiots! Every single day is an issue of some sort. I just can’t do it anymore. I have so many cats I foster that eventually turned to be mine that it is the only thing keeping me here. But I’m re-thinking that. Just can’t take it anymore. My brother took his life because of his pain (different situation) a couple years ago and I told him to help me or come get me. He hasn’t. I just want to go already.
        I’ve got no one and I don’t want anyone. My mother always raised me to ‘”pretend there’s no one else”. that’s how I have always lived. Making sure I can take care of myself. But I can’t anymore and have no one that I would burden with this. The best comment I get from people is when they hurt their back and then say that they know what I’m going through! So ignorant.
        Not sure how much longer I will last. It’s a daily struggle. I so want out. I feel like I must have been really bad in this life for God to let me suffer like this. He won’t even bring me home.
        Good luck to all of you out there with chronic pain. No one but us will ever understand. No one. No one.

        • Boria Reinhardt Noll on March 3, 2017 at 9:02 am

          I too have severe pain.!!! Its horrible and my pain doctor is cutting me off when I go wednesday I need my old meds bc its killng. Me. I don’t want me be here anymore.

        • Frieda on December 14, 2017 at 3:33 pm

          I’m so sorry and I feel the same way you do. How long can I take this? Idk but I contemplate everyday also.

  8. Ann Annonomous on December 31, 2016 at 5:59 am

    Suicide is actually happening more often, because the CDC and DEA are tying the hands of Doctors! They are keeping track of how many opiates that Dr. is prescribing, and this is reason for more suicides with people in chronic pain. There is NO WAY I’d be able to even make it through physical therapy. I’ve been there several times, and it didn’t help at all. I have many auto immune issues that’s the causing all of this to happen. I had a cervical disc surgery in June of 2000, I had to pay cash for that Doctor to do the surgery, because I was just a couple weeks short of getting my new insurance from my fairly new job. So I had to pay it myself! I had NO help from the state what so ever, and i couldn’t even feel my whole arm. The pain was so horrible! Well, that darn donor bone was diseased! And my body absorbed it completely. This time I had insurance that would cover. So i went to a better Doctor. He even told me the same thing happened to his Brother, so he would NEVER do that to anyone again! He used bone from my hip. But it was too late, because that donor bone was diseased, shortly after I was diagnosed with Interstitial Cystitis, then more and more diagnosis of the auto immune variety. Now I just want to end this, I’ve been in so much pain for way too long! Now the DEA and CDC is tying the hands of Doctors to write opiates that actually help! I’ve been on the same dose for many, many years. But my back is getting much worse. I need a higher dosage after all of these years. I had asked for Zohydro, which is like the same meds I’m on. Only it a longer acting medicine. And DOES NOT have the acetaminophen in it at all. I’ve done my homework, and it’s the tylenol in the meds that’s causing other issues! I think this is a bunch of BS that first NOW people are killing themselves. Think about it! They tried the rules, then they cut down. The pain is so bad, and they know they will cut again! When is enough, ENOUGH!! I tell like it is. And I’m absolutely NOT an ADDICT at all! But I want this to end! I’m so DONE! Thanks for all of this waste of my life in pain, I can’t even do simple chores and live alone. I just cannot do this anymore at all! I’m not afraid to die, I have prayed and made good with God. This demon in my body is eating me alive. Time to take a long trip to best paradise…

  9. Janet Harbison on January 2, 2017 at 3:18 pm

    Wow do I understand your pain. I have been cut down to 15% of my normal dose. I’m in hell and ready to die like you. I received 3 vaccinations on 6/26/2000. I was sick and on prednisone. Those shots destroyed my immune system and all of my joints and muscles. I had surgery on my neck and it got infected with MRSA,and the surgery failed. Now my neck hurts so much and the doctor cut something in my tendons when he went back in to clean it out. My right hand doesn’t work and my right arm feels like I’m having a baby in my arm. I had my knees replaced in 2016. One knee in july,the other november. My right knee got infected after surgery. Had to be admitted and be on iv antiobiotics. Well I have 2 brand new knees. The small problem is they hurt more now than before surgery. I had to stop physical therapy because he lowered my meds so low I couldn’t do therapy. Now I can barely walk and waiting for my muscles to atrophy because I can not get out of bed much. All of my joints are dissolving and surgery won’t help,it gets infected and the pain never goes away. My pain meds gave me my life back and I could function. Now I’m just waiting to die a slow death or just end it soon. The doctors dont have the guts or balls to stand up for us. They don’t care about us. I’m fighting for my life with no good results. Noone will listen to me so I’m just waiting and praying that God will take me home soon. I’m ready to die,I don’t have the strength to fight or care anymore. Thankyou DEA AND CDC. I hope they rot in hell.

  10. Jessi Holderer on January 6, 2017 at 6:40 pm

    My husband of 18 years has had multiple surgeries on his back and more and deals with a great amount of pain on a daily basis. He was on multiple opiates for a long time, including Methadone which nearly killed him. He took hisself off them a few times but finally found that just Vicoden with Ibuprofen worked in providing physical and mental relief, gave him an appetite but they stopped prescribing it to him. Right now, he has bursitis and is dealing with additional bad pain daily….we’ve been to an Ortho, the ER, his Primary and no one will prescribe ANYTHING to help, even to just give him a breif break due to the “flag” that is in the computer.
    He went on Subutex for a year (Because he was tired of being accused of “Dr. shopping” …smh,big joke) and was dropped by that Dr. after an injury to his back and was told, at 40 yrs old “man up, I dont even know how your wife can look at you” we were outraged! So we found out a month later upon p/u of his Kolonipin that he had been discharged a month ago, with no notice?! But I had stayed behind and had an appointment card? It didn’t make sense, we made multiple calls to the office when the RN called me back and said she was going to call the police if I called anymore. So he was cut off so suddenly without tapering, also off of all his psych meds, sending him into major withdrawl and endangering his life (all the meds indicate to NOT stop suddenly!!!) it’s been two months, luckily he did not have a seizure or worse. But it HAS sent him into a constant state of depression even though his new primary filled his celexa, he talks about not having hope and killing himself EVERY DAY!! He has it planned, said he can’t see the “look on Dr.’s faces anymore” he has lost so much weight, 6’2 @ 126 lbs? He is emaciated and pale…I got so stressed from having to watch him day and night that I lost my job, have lost 20 lbs, diarrhea every day! I don’t know what to do. I keep telling him to hang in there, it will get better, but I almost feel selfish and a liar because IDK when he will ever be able to receive help. I’ve made psych appointments but I fear it’s going to be too late by Jan 31..

  11. A.S on June 4, 2017 at 3:27 am

    Bilateral frozen shoulder, trigeminal neuralgia and RDS. At my absolute wits end with no better medication than ibuprofen prescribed to me for any if it. Ibuprofen? Come on! Can’t stand it anymore. Can’t tell my significant other cos it will break his heart but he will finally be free. Getting right drunk atm so I can do it. What everyone forgets is that we all die in the end so it’s not that big a deal. It’s not depression, it’s pain.

  12. Gretchen on June 14, 2017 at 6:05 pm

    I’ve been on pain management but the DEA got on my Dr so bad I no longer get it takes me 4mths to get into pain management. I’ve. Had a stroke bursitis in both hips. And I need a knee replacement and tendonitis in rt shoulder. The DEA doesn’t get it I am suicidal with pain they are killing more people. Than opioids are people are miserable and dying.

    • Bob on July 7, 2017 at 12:05 am

      The DEA (GOV’T) does get it. They hope we all die and no longer require Social Security Disability and they really don’t care how we go.

  13. Nat on July 28, 2017 at 12:00 am

    I am a 33year old Canadian living with a displaced nerve root (L4) from a very large disc herniation 3 years ago. Some people may read “Canadian” and think, what does she have to worry about….free health care..
    However when it comes to wait times for care/surgery, many Canadians leave the country to get care.
    I have had chronic pain for 3 years, it began when I was pregnant with my youngest. I was fortunate to be walking until 5 months ago. My pain is so debilitating that it has deformed my body. I have been taken by ambulance multiple times and admitted for pain control. I have severe allergies to narcotics, from airway closure reactions to severe respiratory distress, even when giving at paediatric doses. My body also reacts severely to common “over the counter” medications. I am on a long wait list for a very simple hernia dissection that I’m told will take 40 minutes and is an out patient operation.
    My body is now so severely deformed from this displaced nerve that I look disturbing. My right hip over contacts my right ribcage. I cannot sit. I cannot stand without something sturdy to aid me. Walking is severely difficult. My left leg has severely atrophied and I cannot feel many areas. The pain feels as though someone is cutting my leg off with a dull rusty knife, while being burnt alive down to my left ankle.
    I know that I would have killed myself many months ago if I did not have two young children.
    This debilitating pain and deformity has ruined my marriage. My husband cannot cope in a caregiver role. Instead, he is so miserable that I truly feel it makes my pain worse. We are having discussions about selling our home to pay for the operation out of country.
    Night time is the worst. I am contorted in agony, crying and groaning into pillows. I have not been able to sleep in a bed for months. I live on the couch and only dare to get up for washroom visits which are very difficult when your body is deformed in the shape of a sideways V. Sitting on the toilet is a mental and physical battle.
    Physio, chiropractors, massage, laser, yoga, acupuncture …… the list goes on. (All of which are out of pocket expenses in Canada)
    I told my husband this evening that I was feeling suicidal. His response was “whatever, no your not”, and he went up to bed. This is not a new feeling for me, and I feel that sharing it with him made me feel worse. I then thankfully found this site and feel less alone.
    Up until my most recent pregnancy, I was an avid runner and dancer. Now it is agonizing to even move my arms quickly.
    How can humans live their life this way? Animals are treated better. If the animal cannot be fixed, they are shot to put them out of their misery. The only fascinating part of this pain, is how absolutely powerful the human body is, to be capable of experiencing such horrific sensations. What an obvious flaw when it comes to chronic pain. Or did our creator just expect us to kill ourselves before it got to this point??
    I apologize for the dark place I am in to any readers looking for support. Yet knowing that you are not alone in the constant struggle hopefully helps.

    • Patty on September 11, 2017 at 11:01 pm

      OMG! Nat, what a horrible mess! you have definitely fallen through the cracks of the healthcare system. I can’t even imagine what you are going through. I can only offer my support to you and your family by sending hugs. I am praying that something will change and we willsoon be reading a post about your surgery and good recovery.

  14. Jason Keegan on August 1, 2017 at 4:39 am

    Dear Nat.

    You and the many others here are so very courageous and i salute your bravery.

    Like all the other correspondents here I have had enough of my pain and do not longer want to live anymore. My pain stemmed from a motor vehicle accident over 22 years ago. I have tried everything. I am 51 and compared to Nat and others here my situation seems pretty good. I can walk and swim and run if i have to but unfortunately I am accompanied by pain whilst doing so.

    The hopelessness is overwhelming. And the isolation and loneliness is just to much to bare. I am a single man and it is very difficult to go through this alone. I know your situation is horrible Nat but it must be some small comfort having your children and husband there for you. Even if your husband lacks some empathy.

    Like you Nat, my family lacks empathy to my situation. My mother says “I have a bad attitude”. She just does not understand how debilitating the pain is and how it effects one’s mood and outlook. I find it very difficult to not occasionally lash out at her. It is not fair on her as she is a great mum and i am very lucky to have her.

    Tonight like many previous occasions I told her I cannot live like this anymore. I love life but don’t want to live like this anymore. I know my death would devastate her but I have to do what is best for me. Not her.

    The saddest part about my pain is how it has affected my ability to work and forge lasting romantic relationships. Like anyone I wish I could have a family but being in pain affects your ability to work and consequently your level of confidence and self esteem. This in turn impacts your disposition to be attractive to the opposite sex and also just pursuing your hobbies and interests where you may likely meet a potential partner.

    There is no need to “apologise for the dark place you are in”, Nat. We all understand. I wish our family and friends could experience what we put up with. No one in my family has said how brave or stoic I am. It would mean a lot if they did. Conversely, no one likes to listen to someone banging on about their pain all the time.

    I am a bad patient. I have always thought of myself as a tough and strong guy but maybe I am not as much as i thought.

    if anyone knows of a way committing suicide that is not messy and overly painful and does involve trying to smuggle stuff in from China please let me know. My mind is made up to end my life. I have had enough. I believe taking one’s won life takes more courage tun anything. That is why it is o hard to do.


    • Kim Gremo on October 13, 2017 at 10:15 pm

      Hi Jason. I am a 47 yr old single, sick woman. Who up to 8 yrs ago I worked out everyday, owned businesses & had the energy of 3 people. Due to my illness I’ve become basically bedridden most days. Crazy never could image this. So I can relate to u. My faith has brought me threw. Please don’t give up. U can contact me if u need to talk. I’m not some 1 who goes on social media. I’m only on tonight due to my MD cutting my pain meds & I need to b part of the fight to repeal the CDC guidelines than I read u r story please know their r alot of us out there suffering & we can help each other.☺

  15. Kelly on August 12, 2017 at 10:11 am


    I am a 39 year old woman from UK. I have been dealing with chronic pain and depression for 13 months, which is hardly any time compared to some of you I know.
    I cry pretty much all day every day. I hardly eat and I barely function. Every night I pray I go in my sleep.
    The thought of the rest of my life being like this is too much to bear. I am so scared of the dark thoughts. I just don’t know what to do

  16. Bob on August 22, 2017 at 8:42 pm

    I am 53 years old at work 8 years a go I herniated my l4 l5 and s 1 I hurt it the second time at work in June 2010 schedule for surgery 9 10 Wc steeped in sent me to one I was ther including sainting time 5 minute exam said stop taking pain med and take ibuprofen and go back to work surgery isn’t a option according to him the battle began 3/12 later surgery was performed have nerve damage pain with meds is a 7-9/10 docs are afraid to up meds due to people taking them for fun so the answer like always is to punish the people who really need it and use it right my pain keeps rising I’ve tried virtually everything several different epidural bot 3 sets before and 3 very different ones after physical therapy medication from 2 different pain psychiatric and 2 other psychiatric nothing has worked I’ve tried at least 20 different pain pills and at least as many piss from psychiatric they all batted 100% nothing every worked not even 5 days when w most regions 10 days to take affect I tried all the way and nothing every worked now I sleep at most two hours at a time I used to be able to just groan and Chang position but lately I actually let out full scream at least 3 night a week wife can’t really even sleep with me I really hope your different and they can get you help

  17. James Hutchcroft on September 11, 2017 at 10:20 pm

    I’ve been dealing with chronic back pain for a long time. 7 back surgeries and one spinal stimulator implant and it still kicks my butt.

    I wish for death most days.

    What really pisses me off is my doctors and counselor all say nothing is with committing suicide over; everything is temporary. Well, is 20 years of pain temporary? Do they feel what I feel? NO!

    Who are they to give this kind of advice.

    Death is my cure!

    • Keri Baker on October 6, 2017 at 5:06 pm

      Im in pain most of the time , good days are very rare. Today is one of those bad days. I haven’t been through any surgeries as of yet, but I have a torn rota tor cuff . I cant imagine the pain you experience, but please don’t give up!

    • Kim Gremo on October 13, 2017 at 8:41 pm

      I understand u r feelings. I have a chonic illness, due that I’ve fallen alot & now need spinal fusions, knees replaced & neck surgery which I can’t b approved 4 until my adrenal gland starts functioning again. My 10 yr pain MD cut my dose lower than I was in 2009. I’m only in my 40’s & was always active b 4 all this. Telling u this cause death is not the answer. I am Christian & my faith has helped me threw the years. I’m not giving up now either should any 1 else ,we have 2 fight. If u need 2 talk I’m here & suffering also.

  18. Jeff on October 16, 2017 at 1:31 am

    I have lived with chronic pain for 34 years have had many surgery’s have been on a pain pump since 98 have been on prialt since 09 it has served me well although I still live with pain daily government needs to stay out of medicine hang in there the best you can.

  19. Jeff on October 16, 2017 at 1:40 am

    I have lived with chronic pain for 34 years have had many surgery’s have been on a pain pump since 98 have been on prialt since 09 it has served me well although I still live with pain daily government needs to stay out of medicine hang in there the best you can. Our pain management needs to be between us and our doctor period.

  20. Pissed on November 13, 2017 at 5:51 pm

    So I get it we all live in pain I’m living in horrible pain right now myself so what’s the fucking answer the government knows everything they’ve tied the doctors hands now we have no relief so DEATH is a mercy killing

  21. George on November 28, 2017 at 3:08 pm

    I tried suicide but was found before I was gone, it turns into a bigger nightmare when they lock you up in a psyche ward for “evaluation”. Most of your Dr’s are lying to you about the “laws” concerning prescribing pain meds. I advise you all to learn the new cdc guidelines that they are telling you are “law”! They aren’t laws they are baselines and suggestions! They keep hitting me with the mme <90 MG. crap and I have shown them that they were lying (note to self, Dr's hate that). I've actually been told "don't come at me with your Google I have a degree"! I then had to explain to him that Google does not produce any information they are just a search engine and do not produce the information that comes from their searches the information I produced for them was directly from the CDC website! guys we all need to hang in there and stick together and change this so that we can live somewhat normal lives! I suffer from degenerative disc disease chronic pancreatitis irritable bowel syndrome with diarrhea and some kind of a chronic disease in my testicles yet they still fight about pain medicine yes we all do deserve to live decent lives but it's not going to happen until we all get together and speak up as one

  22. Rich P. on January 18, 2018 at 5:53 pm

    We people with Severe Chronic Pain- we are the Blacklisted in U.S. Medicine, we are the Blacklisted in U.S. Government, and we are the Blacklisted in U.S. society. We are the expendable, we are the people for who it is all okay to cause and make us suffer with life ruining suffering, agonizing, scary, Pain! Yes once again they are taking away and preventing people from using Morphine Medicine for their great daily Pain. Yes for nothing we have done wrong or deserve, they just, punish us for other people’s wrongs that we have nothing to do with, and make us suffer in torturous Pain. We are made to use other gross Medicines that don’t work and have gross side effects, and effect the body worse than Morphine Medicine that works for many people as a Miracle Medicine for Severe Chronic Pain!
    Yes once again we have to use other Medicines that are deadlier than Morphine ever was, but that is the whole con of this game- tell lies about Morphine Medicine, yes Morphine Medicine that is actually for many people with Severe Chronic Pain- a G-d Send, a Miracle Medicine, and a Life Saver. But instead tell lies about it, that my life is proof that it is all lies!
    But the system cares more for drunken drivers, drug addicts, and terrorists from the other side of the globe who want the U.S. people wiped off the map (remember the U.S. Government even passed a law protecting and preventing terrorists in the U.S. from being made to suffer in physical Pain. But yes of course the physical Pain for us U.S. Citizens with Severe Chronic Pain- yes they believe our torturous daily constant Pain is okay for them to take away Morphine Medicine (like I’ve used for about 27 years with NOT one measly problem, for Severe Chronic Pain I’ve had 38 years now), and make us people with Severe Chronic Pain suffer again for nothing with daily constant Pain.
    Yes it is us with daily constant Pain who are alone in a fight against this whole United States, the whole world/earth, and for nothing we deserve, but again- we are the Blacklisted in U.S. Medicine, U.S. Government, and U.S. Society.
    I am days from 57 and treated like a kid and a criminal- and for absolutely nothing I have done or deserve!
    This is no longer the United States, call it what you want, but it is NOT at all the United States!

  23. Amy C and ready to check the hell out. on July 26, 2018 at 3:23 pm

    All I can say is Doobie It dude and FUCK the government. They have no right to say we should have to live in pain. It is our choice, not theirs so they can sit behind their desks, patting themselves on the backs because ” they did something about the drug crisis”. Ass holes

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